SayPro Identify the factors that contribute to separation and loss;

Separation and divorceThree types of motives for divorce were identified by factor analysis: Relational motives included growing apart, not enough attention from partner, not able to talk, not enough time for each other, and sexual problems; Behavioural motives included habits of spouse, alcohol addiction, infidelity and physical violence; and Household organization motives included spouse working too many hours and division of household chores. In the second half of the twentieth century, the Behavioural motives decreased while the Relational and Household organization motives increased. Three important trends were noticed: the normalization of divorces, the psychologization of relationships, and the emancipation of women. According to the Dutch researchers, problems in the realm of work and household labour have become increasingly important motives for divorce/separation, particularly among women. More importance is attached to matters such as understanding and communicating and being sensitive to each other’s needs and feelings. Couples with children living at home reported more divorce motives than other couples. Besides violence, habits of spouse and infidelity, these included the following: the spouse (male) working too hard, the division of labour in the home, and not being able to talk to one another.The importance of household organization and fair division of housework in relation to marital happiness and divorce was investigated in American dual-earner marriages, from 1980 to 1988. Inequality in the division of housework was associated with a decline in marital happiness for both genders, but for women this was also associated with divorce.AddictionAddictions take an emotional and a financial toll on families. Often, the partner who is an addict refuses to acknowledge the effects on the family and chooses not to stop the unhealthy behavior. This can lead to marital stress and, eventually, divorce. Types of addiction include alcohol and/or drug abuse and gambling and sexual addictions. Some additions may take the person’s attention away from the spouse or put financial strain on the family; others, such as substance abuse, can lead to violence or extreme psychological stress.Spousal Abuse and ConflictSpousal abuse, which can be physical, sexual or emotional, is a source of stress in a marriage and can contribute to divorce. Although resorting to violence is an extreme form of conflict, arguments and seemingly minor disagreements can be influential in the decision to separate. Verbal fighting in a marriage is normal, but if the argument turns physical or becomes something that one or both partners can no longer handle, divorce is an option.Financial StressConflict over money is common in marriages and can strain the relationship. According to Seth Meyers, Psy.D. Clinical psychologist and relationship expert, the tendency to be reckless with money or to lack the ability to plan financially negatively affects the spouse and the relationship itself. Other issues may arise due to job loss, one partner making more than the other or a general lack of financial security in the relationship.Infidelity and Trust IssuesInfidelity and trust issues often occur together and can have a significant impact on the decision to separate or divorce. Cheating can lead to distrust and feelings of discontent in a marriage. It can also cause the faithful partner to feel insecure. When trust is lost due to infidelity, one or both partners may have difficulty moving past the betrayal. Loss of trust can also stem from lying, stealing, jealousy or flirting.Loss of Interest and Communication IssuesDuring the course of a marriage, one or both partners may lose interest in the relationship. This can be made worse by a lack of healthy communication with each other. As noted by D. Wayne Matthews, a human development specialist, communication includes facial expressions, listening skills, tone of voice and words used in a discussion. The absence or hostile nature of these factors leads to negative communication patterns and can contribute to a loss of interest in the relationship and subsequent divorce. Expectations“Too much expectation leads to disappointment” – the quote goes well for couples. It is in human nature that if we are unhappy, we force people around us to make changes that could make us happy again. This could include blaming, complaining, threatening to even punishing. When one or both partners are coercing each other to perform undesirable activities, it could lead to disaster. It isn’t bad to ask a partner for a change. In case a partner isn’t ready to oblige then you alone are responsible for happiness.Choosing the Wrong Partner/Marrying for the Wrong ReasonsEither one of these can be a perfect recipe for marriage disaster. According to many divorced women, the issue that eventually cause their divorce had been present since the beginning of their relationship. They may stay in the marriage for some time for a variety of reasons: because of their expectations to live happily ever after, or the amount of money they had spent creating the perfect home, fear of what others will think of their “failure” to make their marriage work, etc. In the end, these reasons don’t usually prove strong enough to stay in the marriage indefinitely.Loss of IdentityAmong the most overlooked factors for divorce is loss of one’s identity in a relationship. If you have to give up your own interests, hobbies, friends, or even the ability to express yourself in the face of spousal disapproval, then there may be a divorce in your future.If you start feeling uncomfortable doing things without your partner, forgetting the movies, activities, food, and music that you had once liked, you may need a reality check concerning your relationship from an old friend who still cares about you

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